The Cousin Debate

Published April 23, 2013 - Muscat Daily newspaper. Click here to view the article.

Earlier this week during a brief jaunt to Muscat, I picked up some trousseau items for a young friend of mine who will be marrying her first cousin in a few weeks. Naturally the marriage is arranged, as is the case with most marriages at this end of the country.

Although he is her first cousin, she barely knows him. He approached her father for her hand in marriage and given the family connections, the father felt obliged to agree to his nephew’s proposal. The marriage was settled, a dowry was paid, and a wedding date was set. She was given ten weeks’ notice to get ready.

Like any good Dhofari bride, she will be so busy preparing for the wedding day that she won’t have time to think about what her future will look like with this man. She knows that she will be moving into a bedroom suite in her relative in-laws’ house. As for the groom, she may hit the jackpot and end up with a very nice guy who will encourage her to pursue an education or - heaven forbid - a career!

Most likely however, she will end up with a man who will get her pregnant immediately and then she will have no choice but to stay at home and be a good wife regardless of whether their relationship works out or not. If she were ever to consider a divorce, the entire family will pressure her to drop the idea.

If she insists, her father will probably swear that he will divorce her mother. The poor bride will end up being forced to remain silent and obedient.

Cases like this happen regularly in Dhofar. Not only are a large percentage of marriages arranged, but they are almost all between first, second, and third cousins. This tradition of inter-breeding goes back hundreds of years and is protected fiercely by the conservative south.

A few years ago a colleague of mine almost married a man from a different tribe. After the engagement, one of her cousins stepped in and swore she would not marry the man. He slaughtered a cow as a symbol of his determination to stop the marriage, and the poor girl’s engagement had to be cancelled because her cousin’s wishes had to be respected. As ridiculous and medieval as this may seem, the practice is very much alive in Dhofar.

Almost everyone in my immediate and extended family is married to a cousin. In fact, if I were to list the number of relatives who have approached me for my not-so-delicate hand in marriage, you would be baffled. At age 15, the first of the relatives came knocking at our door. The argument went along the lines of ‘You’re a treasure that must be kept within the tribe to protect you and keep the blood pure’. Treasure? Tribe? Blood? I’d almost forgotten we were living in the 21st century.

Rest assured that I do not intend to mock our way of life here in Dhofar, but I am concerned that this out-dated tradition may not be appropriate anymore. Not only does it complicate the idea of choosing one’s marriage partner for young people, but genetic and blood disorders are rampant in Oman. In fact, according to data published by the Ministry of Health almost 60 per cent of Omanis carry genes of inherited blood disorders. If this isn’t enough to put you off inter-marriage, then I don’t know what is.

The reasons behind the prevalence of inter-breeding in the south of Oman are purely tribal. Because Dhofar is a patriarchal tribal society, there is an obsession with keeping tribal blood pure and strong. Furthermore, some research has shown that inter-breeding can lead to higher fertility rates. Marrying cousins is also cheaper because dowries are lower, requirements are fewer, and the girl can easily move into her uncle’s house and get along with her in-laws.

If it were up to me, I’d ban cousin-marriage altogether. However, I would say a more logical and fair solution would be to enforce pre-marital genetic screening for relatives. Your thoughts?

The Issue of FGM in Oman

Published January 1, 2013 - Muscat Daily

A year and a half ago I wrote a column titled ‘Woman with an incense burner’ where I tried as delicately as possible to highlight the issues concerning female genital mutilation (FGM) in Oman, and Dhofar in particular where the practice is still very common.

The feedback I received from readers and acquaintances was overwhelming. Most of them expressed how horrified they were to learn this tradition was still going strong in Dhofar. Some advised me to tread carefully, whereas others told me to keep spreading awareness.

Naturally, I also received plenty of negative feedback from relatives and colleagues claiming I was hanging Dhofar’s dirty washing for the world to see and criticising a practice that they believe is purely Islamic. I paid little attention to these criticisms because I know the practice is harmful and primitive.

It was my intention to write today's column in February to mark the International Day of Zero Tolerance for FGM. However, a little over a week ago the United Nations General Assembly passed a historic resolution calling for an FGM ban in all countries. What does this resolution mean for Oman?

Although FGM is banned in hospitals in Oman, in Salalah for example the woman with the incense burner still roams the halls of the maternity ward at Sultan Qaboos Hospital chopping up newborn girls' genitals at their mothers' request. The nurses and doctors know she exists, yet they turn a blind eye. Other women take their newborns to older women in the tribe who perform it quietly then pierce the baby's ears at the same time to make sure people think the baby's howling is caused by ear pain

Should the government pass a legislation immediately banning the practice in Oman? Not necessarily. Introducing a new law before spreading awareness is a recipe for failure. The subject is still very taboo and is not even discussed in private, let alone in public. The first step is to bring it out into the open. In such a conservative society, this can prove to be quite a challenge.

One must also take into consideration the fact that women have been carrying out this tradition for hundreds of years. I mention women specifically because it is my understanding that most men are kept in the dark about this practice. In fact, several men who were willing to discuss it with me explained how horrified they were to discover their daughters had been circumcised. In the north of Oman I believe it's more of a paper cut. In the south, the practice is more brutal and involves chopping off part of or the entire clitoris.

Although locals wholeheartedly believe the practice is healthy and obligatory in Islam, our religion neither encourages the practice nor condemns it. Information explaining why it's harmful to the child is not readily available to mothers. I blame the Ministry of Health mainly for this. I have spent enough time in maternity wards to know that the ministry is doing next to nothing to spread awareness. Women are terrified of what will happen if they do not circumcise their daughters, and by keeping silent the ministry is feeding the belief that the practice is healthy. Perhaps they think that by ignoring it the practice will go away?

It is worth noting that the MOH five-year 2006-2010 health plan included the need for studying the prevalence of FGM in Oman with plans to design awareness programs. To date, none of these plans have come to light, and goodness knows whether combating FGM is on the current agenda. The ministry's website is either very outdated or the current five-year plan has yet to materialise.

Assuming I were the Minister of Logic, I would encourage the Ministry of Awqaf and Religious Affairs, the Ministry of Social Development, Ministry of Health, and Ministry of Education to collaborate in launching a nationwide campaign to spread awareness among Omanis.

The walls of maternity wards across Oman should be plastered with awareness posters explaining the dangers of FGM. Mothers of newborn girls should receive an awareness kit including a booklet about FGM with a message from the Ministry of Awqaf and Religious Affairs confirming it is not obligatory in Islam. There should be health officials visiting maternity wards in the country to talk to mothers of newborn girls.

Continuing to ignore the practice will not look good for Oman. Our country has already made headlines in the international human rights arena too many times than is good for us in the past couple of years since the Arab Spring protests in 2011. Our reputation when it comes to freedom of speech and assembly is already tainted. Do we need to see more embarrassing reports concerning Oman's unwillingness to address the issues concerning violence against women (i e FGM)? With the new UN resolution, people will be watching Oman carefully. I say it's time for some action. What do you think?

Female Genital Mutilation (FGM) in Dhofar: The Woman with the Frankincense Burner

Published  June 7, 2011 - Muscat Daily

A few days ago I was at Sultan Qaboos Hospital in Salalah visiting a friend who had just given birth to a beautiful baby girl.

There were several other women there when I arrived, and we all took turns holding the baby and marveling (naturally) at how perfect she was. When the baby was in my arms, I heard someone whispering ‘Come on, Susan. We have to leave’.

I looked up and saw an odd-looking older woman standing at the foot of the bed with what looked like a toiletries bag and a large frankincense burner. I must have had a confused look on my face because the woman standing next to me whispered into my ear again, “We have to go. She’s going to do it.”

The mother of the baby looked distressed and helpless but her mother-in-law seemed to be in control of the situation. I was herded out of the ward along with the other women, and only then did I realise the old woman with the frankincense burner had come to circumcise the child.

Shocking, isn’t it? To think that we live in the 21st century and such primitive practices still take place behind closed doors and secretly in hospital corridors. Almost all girls over the age of about 15 in Salalah have been circumcised. I thought the practice had died down over the past decade and was no longer prevalent in Salalah but evidently I am mistaken. I decided to make a few enquiries regarding the woman with the frankincense burner.

According to my sources, she has been at the hospital for as long as they can remember. She roams the maternity wards all day and makes herself available to anyone who wishes to mutilate their newborn daughters’ genitals.

Obviously she does not work for the hospital, and I have no idea how she supports herself because evidently she does it for free. All I know is that people demand her services because they truly believe it’s the right thing to do.

Many women in Salalah and in other parts of the Middle East claim it is obligatory in Islam and they refuse to discuss it any further.

Al Azhar Supreme Council of Islamic Research, the highest religious authority in Egypt, issued a statement saying female genital mutilation (FGM) has no basis in core Islamic law or any of its partial provisions and that it is harmful and should not be practiced.

I have no idea how prevalent the practice is in other parts of Oman and how much brutality is involved, but I know for a fact that it is widely practiced in Dhofar. If they tell you everyone carries it out ‘lightly’ like a small paper-cut, that’s a complete lie.

It may be true for a handful of families, but after speaking with several women I know, they confirmed that traditionally the whole clitoris is removed and the area burned to ensure that all nerves are dead, hence the frankincense burner. There are also several local clinics in Oman that can do it. Is it even legal?

What baffles me is that many men are not aware that this practice still exists in Dhofar. The problem with FGM is that it is performed by and defended by women, and is considered one of Dhofar’s best-kept secrets. In most cases, women do not ask the permission of the father before performing FGM on a newborn. I wonder how our men feel about that.

Education seems to be the only answer and change won’t happen overnight. The first step is to bring it out into the open without fear or shame. This should not be a taboo subject. The Ministry of Health (MoH) should start an awareness campaign explaining the health risks. There should be posters up in the maternity wards at all hospitals.

People still practice FGM because they think it’s healthy and they’re afraid of what will happen to their daughters if they aren’t circumcised. Many believe that by putting their daughters through this they are protecting them. From what, I wonder?

At times like these people need to distinguish between Islam and culture. Because the practice holds much cultural and marital significance, FGM opponents recognise that ending it requires that they work closely with local communities in order to spread awareness of the profound social, sexual and medical consequences of this practice. This tradition is kept alive by the lack of dialogue. This is where MoH should come in.

I could go on about this forever. The practice is considered a violation of the basic rights of women, and since it is mostly carried out on newborn girls, it is also considered a violation of children’s rights. Now, what can you, as an individual, do about this? You can start by spreading the word. Speak to the women in your family and help bring this issue out into the open. Change begins at home! 

Young People & Depression

Published February 15, 2011

The first time I ever thought of depression as a medical condition was nearly a decade ago when one of my high school classmates here in Salalah suddenly stopped attending classes halfway through the semester. She’d always been a loner and didn’t participate much in class so it took a few days before anyone realized she was gone. Two weeks later, she still hadn't showed up. Slowly rumors began to spread about her sudden disappearance and despite her family's desperate attempts at concealing the truth, we found out she had tried to end her life by swallowing bleach. She had been suffering from severe clinical depression and heaven knows what else, but her family refused to acknowledge it. Instead, they took her to local witchdoctors whose diagnosis was simply demonic possession. After undergoing a couple of exorcisms she decided she couldn't cope with life anymore and wanted to take the easy way out. She was seventeen at the time.

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Sadly, situations like this one are not uncommon here in Dhofar. I can think of at least ten young people I know who have suffered from severe depression but weren't brave enough to tell their families or go to a doctor for fear of being talked about and criticized. In our conservative society, people with depression or any form of mental illness are looked down upon, and if they do speak up they are immediately taken to a witchdoctor or religious sheikh. I agree that keeping your faith strong works in many cases for adults, but isn't shoving a prayer book into the hands of a depressed teenager who is struggling with suicidal thoughts a little harsh?

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There's no point denying the fact that depression is an illness that is definitely on the rise among young people and adults in Oman and all over the world, but the good news is that medical treatment is available. Believe it or not, there are some really excellent psychologists in our government and private hospitals and clinics who can help patients suffering from clinical depression. According to SQU Hospital in Muscat, over two thousand women were diagnosed with depression in 2010. The fact that they sought medical help at all is a huge step in the right direction. I can only wish the same were true for Salalah. We have a long way to go before people here open up about mental illnesses. Sure, it's discussed in secret and anonymously in local internet forums, but we need to publicly shed light on the situation. Our kids need to be educated about their mental wellbeing. They need to know when to ask for help. Most young people are reluctant to seek help and don't realize that proper treatment (i.e. not branding or exorcisms) can alleviate the symptoms in most cases. Yet because it often goes unrecognized, depression continues to cause unnecessary suffering.

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Several decades ago life in Oman was much simpler than it is now and depression wasn't much of an issue, but nowadays life can be too whelming for many young people. Some of us are able to cope but others simply can't. We all have our low days every now and then, but when one or two days become several months, it's time to seek help. The frightening thing is that many young victims in Oman feel they have nowhere to go for help. Most parents aren't able to recognize the symptoms, let alone school counselors and teachers.

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I am in no way an expert on anything related to mental health but I have witnessed enough cases in this town where severe depression has been mistaken for demonic possession and hushed to protect the family's reputation. We need more mental health professionals in rural areas outside the capital and we need to shed more light on the secrecy surrounding mental illness in Omani culture. It's nothing to be ashamed of.

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On a final note… since one of the strengths of society here is the fact that we're so intricately connected, surely we can use that to our advantage by providing collective support to people who suffer from mental illnesses? When someone dies, we rush to support the family and when someone is in need, we do the same. Surely if someone is suffering from depression, we could provide support as well?

Forever White

Published July 20, 2010

If you’ve ever been to Salalah you may have noticed an unusual number of stores claiming to sell ‘women’s necessities’. If you’ve actually been into one of these shops, you will observe that at least one large section of the shop is dedicated to whitening products, and another even larger section to an extraordinary selection of makeup. The complexion of the female cashier ringing up your items at the front of the store is a pale greyish white. It seems a little odd to you. As she fumbles to give you the right change, you notice that her hands are the colour of coffee beans. You look up again at her face and try not to gasp. Surprised? Don’t be. She is only one among thousands of female victims in Salalah who were brainwashed into thinking at an early age that in order to be considered beautiful, you must be white.

It’s no secret that Dhofari women are obsessed with being white. In fact, we seem to be quite famous for it! There are several women in Salalah who are well-known for their secret whitening ‘mixes’. They mix three or four whitening products with bleach and sell them for a high price in glass jars, catering mostly to young women and especially to brides-to-be. I’ve known girls who removed several layers of skin from their faces (using one of the mixes) in a feeble attempt to look white. Despite the fact that they end up looking like burn victims, many of them are satisfied. They seem to think it will make them more presentable ... more worthy (of what?). It’s very sad.
 

Our weddings are even worse. Somehow, over the past twenty years or so, Dhofari women have developed strict wedding makeup standards that no woman, in my opinion, should ever feel the need to comply with. Women spend months trying to book a makeup artist for any wedding they plan to attend, even if they are only distantly related to the family of the bride. In order to hide the natural colour of the girl’s skin, the female makeup artist applies several layers of unnaturally white makeup to the face, neck, back, chest, and any other visible part of skin (sometimes even legs!).

She then pulls out a pallet with an unidentifiable white substance on it that has the consistency of Vaseline and uses a paintbrush to apply it to the eyebrows, covering them completely in order to draw fake stick eyebrows an inch above their natural place. She then spends at least a couple of hours working on the eye makeup and lips. The girl ends up leaving the makeup artist’s house or salon several hours later (and fifty to a hundred rials poorer) looking like something between a geisha and a Goth. The look is bizarre. And then they proceed to the wedding, where they join hundreds of other unrecognizable women who are all equally plastered in white.
 

And if you thought that getting Dhofari makeup on was a struggle, wait until you hear how it is removed! My friends and relatives claim that dish detergent and a spoon for scraping is the only successful method. After an hour of scrubbing, scraping, and washing, the expected result is a sore but clean face.
 

I was at a wedding recently where the woman sitting next to me looked at my simple makeup with sad eyes and said ‘You are lucky to have enough confidence to come here looking like that.’ Looking like what? Myself? What is so shameful about that? I wanted to scream at all the women around me and tell them they are stunningly beautiful as they are.
 

Despite being educated and aware of all the health warnings, they continue to think white is more beautiful. All the shops continue to stock up on whitening products to support this local obsession. High school girls think that by smearing poison on their faces that they will live a happier life. I understand that this problem happens in many places in the world, but I tend to believe that it’s more visible in Dhofar. Most females here are unable to see that their dark-skinned beauty is something to be proud of! How beautiful we are, in all our shades and hues taken from the very earth we walk upon. Time to wake up and see beyond colour!

Premarital Screening, Anyone?

Published June 22, 2010
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As Oman observes World Sickle Cell Day this week for the first time (June 19th), and as wedding season starts with pomp and grandeur in Dhofar, I feel obliged to shed light on the issues of hereditary blood disorders and premarital testing. It is no secret that hereditary blood disorders are as common as your regular flu in Oman. The three main inherited disorders are Sickle Cell Disease (over 6% of Omanis carry it), Thalassemia (2% of the population), and finally, according to the Oman Hereditary Blood Disorders Association, 25% of Omani males and 10% of females are G6PD patients. Carriers of these three disorders tend to be more clustered up North but these disorders also exist in Dhofar due to intermarriage. And that isn't all! I won't go into the horrific local statistics on children with disabilities and birth defects.
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In Oman, where marriage between first cousins is the norm and where over 58% of the population carry hereditary blood disorders, it's simply logical that premarital screening should be mandatory. Yet despite the disturbing statistics, it still isn't! Many people I've spoken to around Salalah have never even heard of premarital screening or tend to falsely believe the tests are needed simply to determine whether one of the concerned parties is HIV positive or infertile. Naturally, they aren't keen on having such tests done for fear of public shame and embarrassment. Furthermore, a large percentage of Omanis aren't aware of the fact that disorders such as Sickle Cell Disease are hereditary. Little do they know!
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Pre-marital screening is a group of tests for couples who plan to get married. Though not advertised at all, to the best of my knowledge these tests can be done easily at any one of Oman's major hospitals. Many couples may both look and feel healthy, but are actually silent carriers of infectious or hereditary diseases. For couples considering marriage (especially when they are relatives!), pre-marital screening is imperative in identifying potential health problems and risks for themselves and their future children. Couples in a consanguineous marriage run the risk of having children with genetic birth defects such as Down’s syndrome and autism. This can be prevented! It is vital for these couples to be screened in order to help them to understand their genetic background and, if necessary, take precautions or needed treatment.
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However, many of you know as well as I do that getting young people to undergo pre-marital screening is going to be a hell of a struggle. In most cases, the couple haven't really spent time discussing marriage together since many marriages are arranged. Furthermore, testing is a sensitive topic. Many men are too proud and the tribal system doesn't really support the idea. In fact, many families think that it's taboo and tend to believe that marriage is made in heaven and no test is going to break up a marriage simply because both parties are Thalassemia carriers! Also, any couple who are madly in love and want to get married aren't going to appreciate it when a doctor informs them that there are blood issues involved and it would be wise to think again. However, as far as I'm concerned, and as far as children are concerned, love does not prevail in these cases. Nor does tribalism or pride!
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Our children need to be educated about these issues in school, and the health officials, we hope, will conduct vigorous campaigns encouraging citizens to undergo premarital screening and promote better health. In the end, it's worth it. It is of utmost importance that local media publications highlight these issues and urge Omanis and expats alike to take hereditary disorders more seriously. Premarital testing can prevent 60 percent of birth defects and nearly 100 percent of commonly inherited blood disorders like Thalassemia and sickle cell anaemia.
 

If you know someone with a blood disorder then you will agree with me that there's nothing worse than seeing a five year old child hospitalized, in pain and on morphine while trying to get through a sickle cell crisis. Whoever is in favor of making premarital tests mandatory in Oman raise your hand! Both mine are up!

Females & Fitness

Published March 30, 2010 - Muscat Daily

Before I elaborate any further, I hope all men reading this column at present are thanking their lucky stars and counting their blessings for being able to simply throw on a pair of shorts and go for a jog or play soccer everyday barefoot on the beach at sunset. Women can only dream of being so privileged.

If I were to describe the history of female physical activity in Dhofar it would be something like the following.

Thirty to forty years ago women worked hard in their homes or mountain huts, or with their animals. They were active, fit and strong. Then the first change came with the sudden introduction of the fashion of having a male cook from India in each house. The next step came with the introduction, around twenty five years ago, of Asian housemaids and lives were transformed forever. After the housemaids, satellite dish television was soon to follow, and women started spending too many hours in front of their magic boxes, slowly putting on the pounds.

 Ten years ago, after a frightening increase in obesity among women, several of the clever ones started walking (in full veil) during the evenings to try and lose some weight and stay healthy. They were limited to walking along the airport road or exercising in their own bedrooms because the idea of a young woman working out anywhere else was still unspeakable. Five years ago a new trend was introduced: all-female health clubs. Very few actually worked out at these clubs because the idea of shedding the abaya and headscarf in a public place and doing pushups with other women was simply too weird for most women, let alone the male members of their families. Finally, over the past year or so, enrollment at local health clubs has reached the point where some clubs are running four or five aerobics classes a day to accommodate all the eager women who want to work out, and new clubs are opening regularly.
 

After visiting one of the more popular health clubs at the centre of town with one of my friends recently, I was pleasantly surprised. At the front of the building was a reception area where one of the club's employees stood guard to ensure no male accidentally entered the all-female territory. At the back were changing rooms as well as a spacious room lined with treadmills and every possible exercise machine you can imagine. Finally the main attraction was the huge workout room lined with mirrors from floor to ceiling. There were over 20 women warming up in their sweatpants and t-shirts, getting ready to dive into an intense session of aerobics.

The instructor switched on a rather amusing workout CD made up of a mixture of Western techno-remixes and Middle Eastern belly dancing music. The women got to work following instructions from their tough trainer. They worked their muscles, faithfully did their pushups, and even did a little weightlifting, for a whole hour without a break. After the class the women filed into the changing rooms and put on their layers of black, getting ready to leave. Once they were out of the building, you would never have been able to guess where they'd been unless you had spotted the Nike sneakers under the abayas. I was impressed.
 

Despite being banned in places like Saudi Arabia, all-female health clubs are certainly one of the more positive trends I've noticed in Salalah lately. Although the idea still raises eyebrows quite often, it's not as taboo as before. The reservations that some people have about all-female health clubs can be rather amusing sometimes! Please rest assured that these are not 'shady' places and there are no suspicious activities going on behind the closed doors!
 

Overall, I can definitely say people in Salalah are becoming more health conscious for a variety of reasons. The most obvious reason is a rapid increase in obesity, heart problems, and diabetes among locals. Furthermore, instead of 'fattening the bride' for weddings, men now find slimmer women more attractive. Times are changing … for the better! Women are more confident, healthy, and energetic. These health clubs are simply places where women can shed the layers of black and do some real exercise with other like-minded females. I salute all the weight-lifting, muscle crunching, mat-working women who aren't afraid of being healthy. Now if we could only work on their eating habits....

Tackling Cancer

Published March 16, 2010 - Muscat Daily

It's no big secret that the number of people diagnosed with cancer nowadays in Oman and worldwide is increasing on a frighteningly rapid basis. According to the World Health Organization, cancer is a leading cause of death worldwide with over 8 million deaths in 2007 alone. That doesn't even count living patients and new cases. Most people I know have a relative or two or even more with cancer, and I'm sure you know a few people yourself.

Despite it being so common, people here in the South of Oman still have a hard time discussing it openly and some cannot even pronounce the word 'cancer' out loud. Furthermore, many are so overcome with fear that they end up refusing to undergo surgery or chemotherapy. Yes, Salalah is still very conservative and many people believe it’s a ‘shame’ for others to know they have cancer. It’s most certainly nothing to be ashamed of! Whether it's breast cancer you're dealing with, colon cancer, stomach cancer, or liver cancer, in the end it all boils down to how you and the doctors deal with it and… what you eat.
 

The first mistake cancer patients and their network of acquaintances make is to adopt a negative attitude and immediately assume they're dying. In Salalah I've seen women go into mourning simply because a relative was diagnosed with a mild case of colon cancer. Yes, it's a horrible illness, but putting on a sad face and acting helpless isn't going to help those who are sick. Cancer patients need non-stop positive support from family and friends throughout the months, or years of battling.
 

The second mistake they make is to expect surgery and chemotherapy alone will save those with cancer. The first thing any patient or caregiver must do is spend time doing research on that particular kind of cancer. Understanding the disease, studying nutrition, and going the extra mile to help oneself and others can make a huge difference.
 

The third mistake is to believe that they have to immediately go abroad to places like Thailand or Germany (and now, even China!), assuming that Oman doesn't have the doctors or the facilities to treat cancer properly. If you believe this, then you are very wrong. Out of experience, I can confirm that hospitals in Muscat have wonderful teams of experienced oncologists and surgeons.
 

The fourth and last mistake is to underestimate the power of food. You are what you eat, and when undergoing cancer treatments and chemotherapy the most effective method of keeping yourself and your immune system strong is through proper nutrition. Let's face it; Oman in general and Dhofar in particular have some of the world's worst eating habits. Our diet (too much sugar, fat, meat, white flour) feeds cancer cells, and there is no place in Salalah where cancer patients can go to get information on nutrition. A branch of the National Association for Cancer Awareness is very much needed in Dhofar. Patients need information, support, and advice.
 

I cannot fit all that I have to say on this subject into one column, and I am in no way an expert. However, I have spent hundreds of hours at local and other hospitals supporting others through their battle with this ugly disease, so I know one thing for sure; so much of it is about your attitude. If you know someone with cancer, give them your full support and if you feel they're struggling, help them to understand their illness and what they can do to help themselves. Do whatever you can. It will mean the world to them. And meanwhile, spread awareness about what people (who don’t have cancer) can do through nutrition, a positive attitude and good living habits to lower the odds that they themselves will ever suffer from this horrible disease.

Sugar Shortage Shock: A Good Thing!

Published February 2, 2010 - Muscat Daily
 

We often walk into our local supermarket and find that a certain item we're looking for like creamy peanut butter or soy milk is missing. We grumble, get the rest of our groceries, and leave while making a mental note to buy that item the next time we're in town. A couple of days ago I walked into one of the main supermarkets in Salalah and heard a lot of commotion at the back. I moved closer to hear what all the fuss was about. Turns out the store was out of sugar. Not a surprise considering the fact that there is a global sugar shortage due to bad weather affecting production in Asia.

There were several very upset customers. There was shouting and lots of complaining. I left the store thinking about why the lack of sugar would cause such an uproar. I could live without sugar, but for most people down here in the South, sugar is a staple. In fact, if I were to summarize the diet of most locals here it would consist of mainly sugary red tea, milk, rice, ghee, meat, chicken, fish, white bread, and Mountain Dew. It's no secret that people here aren't big on fresh fruit, vegetables, or any other type of healthy food. In fact, it's no secret at all that we probably have the worst eating habits in the whole of Oman. Every family I know has at least one or two people suffering from obesity, diabetes, blood pressure, and/or heart disease. I hate to think about the statistics.
 

Why don't we pay more attention to our health? Doctors have been preaching for years, children are taught about healthy habits in school, TV programs broadcast it every day. It's a mystery why locals refuse to listen. Our schools continue to sell salty potato chips, sugary drinks, and chocolate bars to our children. Hospital food continues to be basically less than healthy. New fast food restaurants are opening up on a frighteningly regular basis. Last, but not least, locals continue to eat rice, ghee, and animal protein at least once a day. This is bad food combining. The level of consumption of fruit and vegetables is so minimal per person, it is not really worth mentioning.
 

Not so long ago (but definitely before the 1970's), people in the South used to work from sunrise to sunset with their animals, or they would have been out fishing or working on their plantations. Red meat was a rare commodity (slaughtering took place on special occasions only), and so was sugar. They ate what they could get: beans, fish, milk, vegetables and fruit grown locally, etc. They were slim and very strong. The moment living conditions improved, eating habits changed. Rice and meat became available on a regular basis. So did sugar, tea, bread, cheese, white flour and other simple commodities. People started moving into town, driving cars, hiring servants, getting sedentary jobs and worst of all, setting up the satellite dish television as the focal point of interest in the house.
 

Somehow, over the past 30 years we developed an unhealthy lifestyle and the eating habits to go with it. Somehow, it became acceptable to have rice and meat dripping in ghee twice a day. The really bizarre thing is that, somehow, after all these years during which we could have changed our habits, slaughtering, or at least eating meat is still the main activity on special occasions. And now, it's not just the special' occasions, it's basically all occasions. No picnic is complete without meat, no family visit is possible without meat. For a group of men (all suffering from at least one each of the terrible health conditions I mentioned above) to go on a 3 or 4 day 'picnic' and take anything other than red meat as their staple, along with their bag of sugar for their tea would be unthinkable, and in fact, embarrassing.

I take hope in the fact that there are a few (yes, and I hope the number grows fast) people who are realizing that the game is up. They have watched close members of their family suffer through years of diabetes or repeated heart operations, and somewhere in the backs of their minds, they are aware of the repeated chorus from doctors, well meaning people and television: "brown bread, vegetables, fruit, no fat, no sugar, no red meat". I pray that the shock of many families as they search for and don't find sugar will force them to see that maybe they don't need it, and in fact feel a lot better without it. And from there, they might just begin to listen to those who know better and who are desperate to help before it's too late.

The Shisha Café Scene

Published January 19, 2010 - Muscat Daily

Anyone who visits Salalah is bound to drive along Haffa beach in the old souk area, or what we locals call 'The Corniche'. It used to be a quiet area where you would often see families sitting at their doorsteps chatting or fishermen mending their nets on the sidewalk under the coconut trees. Sadly, now all you see on that long stretch of beach are white plastic tables and chairs belonging to the cheap restaurants or ' cafés ' that basically serve tea and shisha (commonly known as hookah), and very little else.

 If you drive along the beach any evening of the week, between 5 p.m and 2 a.m, you'll see hundreds of Dhofari men in small groups at these tables smoking shisha and drinking tea. Not only is it popular here among local young men, but it seems to be very popular with the tourists. Shisha restaurants don't exist only on the beach, but can be found practically anywhere in town, in hidden alleyways, in farm plantations, and now even extending up into the mountains. Is Salalah slowly turning into the shisha hub of Oman? Do we want that kind of publicity?

Looking back, I am guessing that this unhealthy habit appeared in Salalah back in the mid 1990's. However, nowadays it has become a social trend that is well integrated into the daily routines of men in Dhofar. Most of the men who hang out at these restaurants are between the ages of 20 and 40. Dare I compare them to pubs in England? Both are male hangouts. Both provide the opportunity to socialize. Both are places where you can watch sports on television. Both may or may not employ attractive female waitresses. Last but not least, both serve an addictive substance.
 

It amuses me to see that men tend to believe that spending hours smoking shisha adds to their social status & sense of prestige. I asked a number of people I know why they find shisha so attractive, and their answers were very similar. They all agreed that shisha makes them high, kills all the spare time they have on their hands, and provides an atmosphere for socializing. As a person who suffers from allergies, I have no respect for people who smoke. What's so great about filling your lungs and the air around you with smoke? Does it make you feel good about yourself in the long run? I doubt it.

Sadly, there are several places in Salalah now where even women can get their dose of tobacco. Personally, I think it's an extremely unpleasant and unhealthy habit and I will never understand why men do it, let alone women.
 

I've come to notice that many users here believe that shisha smoke is significantly less dangerous than that from cigarettes. The moisture induced by hookas makes it less irritating and thus may trick the smoker into thinking it's the healthier option. Studies by the World Health Organization have confirmed that use of shisha is as harmful to a person's health as smoking cigarettes, if not more. In a one-hour shisha session, users consume about 200 times the smoke and about 70 times the nicotine as they do in one cigarette. People who smoke shisha have five times the risk of lung cancer as non-smokers. Why do it?
 

Several shisha smokers I know claim that if they had something more interesting to do, they'd probably quit. Perhaps Salalah needs more sports facilities, useful entertainment centers, bowling alleys, bookstores, cinemas, and more decent places to kill time? More activities for young people? Sounds like a topic for one of my future articles!